You never know what you have until you've lost it
by NaruHinaforever
Summary: Have you ever heard of the saying that you don’t know what you have until you’ve lost it? Well I Lavi Jr. Bookman learned my lesson..." Pairing Laven. One shot enjoy 3 Slight TykixAllen and little bit of KandaxLenalee.


You never Know what you have until you've lost it

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone from -man

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Have you ever heard of the saying that you don't know what you have until you've lost it? Well I Lavi Jr. Bookman learned my lesson. I'm currently an ex member of a secret organization known as the Historian's Society. We are a group of men and women who left mankind in order to obtain historical data. So basically we are not to take part in the history rather observe it. But before I was a Bookman, a man made for only recording history, I had a life. I lived in a small town, not trying to sound conceited but I was pretty popular with the girls. Hehe…well yea my fire red hair and grass green eyes, my right eye had a bit of a problem so I covered it up with an eye patch. The teachers didn't have much of a problem with that. I swear, I think the fan girls increased throughout the years! You'd think that a hot sexy guy like myself would have gotten so many girlfriends well your wrong there! There was this kid this first year, his name was Allen Walker; the kid had snowy white hair and those deep large pale blue eyes and the red scar in addition to his gloved hand. All of these qualities made him a target for bullies. I mean I remember when we had gym, the first years were outside along with us seniors, the uniform was short up to your knee for the summer, short sleeve white t-shirt and white running shoes. I swear to everything I love Allen had the most feminine legs I've ever seen in a guy. I remember when he got ambushed in the locker room. The guys were teasing him and saying how they should strip him down to see if he was really a guy. The kid looked helpless, like a lost puppy, I pitied him. Well at least until I saw him…

**-Flash Back-**

"_Hey you guys block the door way," a group of boys both seniors and freshman surrounded the white haired boy. The boy just simply looked at them with a calm expression. The guys seemed a little ticked because they didn't receive the reaction that they wanted from the boy. Allen took a step back but the guys tackled him, once they were about to take off the glove Allen head butted the boy who dared touch him. Then a swift kick send the boy down, soon there were too many holding down the white haired boy. He was out numbered, "little brat who do you think you are?!" shouted the one who was holding him down by the back of the throat. Allen glared at him, the boy was pissed off and was about to punch him, but a hand caught his. _

"_Nee-nee don't you guys think that you've done enough damage?" asked the red haired boy, all of the guys backed off, "hey kid you okay?" _

"_Yea…thank you senpai," he replied his bangs shielding his eyes. _

"_Well if you say so…by the way the names Lavi," he grinned patting this white haired kids head._

"_I'm Allen," _

"_Really well then I'll call you moyashi!"_

**-End of Flashback-**

Funny how at first Allen was strong but hey don't judge a book by its cover hehe. The little Moyashi and I started hanging out more, and then I found him acting weird, all school-girl like. His face was always red when we bumped into each other. He would always run off to his Chinese friend, she was pretty hot but her brother Komui would murder anyone who even breathed her air. Real turn off if you ask me…

But anyways Allen was always avoiding me so you know enough is enough! And I cornered him behind the school, I don't like it when people are all up in your conversation. I mean seriously people it's an A B conversation! Plus rumors spread faster then what you'd believe. There was one point where this girl was all clingy to me, the next day people kept on asking me if we went out. Obviously I said No, but the girl said otherwise. I'm not really surprised. But whatever, back to the back of the school. Allen was paler then usual…

**-Flash Back-**

"_Allen wait!" called out Lavi holding on to his friends wrist before the white hair boy could make a run for it, "come on!" he dragged the said boy to the back of the school where no one would disturb them. Once the reached their destination the two stood there in awkward silence. _

"_L-Lavi…" _

"_Hmm?" _

"_Never mind," Allen focused his eyes on the gray ground._

"_Okay since you won't talk then I'll ask!" stated Lavi lifting his friends chin so they could be eye to eye. "You've been avoiding me for a month now…at first I thought 'hey Allen probably needs his space' but I was wrong…something's wrong and I wanted to know what's bothering you so much?!" the silence that Lavi broke had returned. The white hair boy's cheeks were a bright apple red his eyes focused on anywhere but Lavi. _

"_It's kind of weird…" he started. _

"_What's weird?"_

"_My feelings…"_

"_Your feelings?" _

"_Yea… this might sound really corny but every time I'm near you my heart pounds really hard and I find myself think about only you…I've never felt like this before…" his eyes were full of tears now threatening to roll down his pale flushed cheeks. "So I-I thought that m-maybe avoiding you…might make things go back to n-normal," he sniffed. _

"_Oh Allen," said Lavi hugging his friend. "That is call having a crush," he whispered. He felt bad for his friend knowing that he didn't have a childhood that would of taught him what it mean to be in love._

"_In…love?!" Allen choked, "Isn't that weird I'm a guy you're a guy…" his eyes narrowed but he hid his face in Lavi's chest. _

_After a few minutes when by the two parted and Lavi stayed quiet. They just left it like that and ignored the subject._

**--End of flashback--**

Though I have to admit that I was a jerk to Allen, I ignored him after that day. I think I was homophobic. Every time our eyes meet I could see the hurt but I guess understanding look. Apparently rumors spread faster the Aid's here and people found out that Allen was Gay, he got teased on more. Like there were moments where people would push him, insult him or write horrible things in his stuff but he would just brush it off and continue going forward. Lenalee still hung out with him and would defend him. I think that Allen told Lenalee about the whole situation because she would occasionally glare at me. She reminded me off Kanda Yuu, another one of my friends. Though around that time he was training for the Kendo tournament. Though there was one day that I think caused me to lose my homophobic self…

**--Flash Back--**

_It was 3 o'clock when the students of the Black Order were leaving school. "Allen-kun you want to walk together home?" asked the Chinese girl. _

"_Not yet I promised Tiedoll-sensei that I would help clean up the art room," he smiled apologetically. She only nodded in understanding way. The two said their good byes and headed towards their destination. _

_Meanwhile_

"_Hey Lavi good game today!" shouted a random person. Today the seniors had free period and some of the guys choose to go outside and play soccer. Lavi was heading towards the school to get something from homeroom. He saw Tiedoll-sensei leaving. 'Guess he was the last to leave,' thought the red head. Continuing on towards his destination. When he heard noised coming from the art room. His curiosity took over and Lavi opened the door to the art room, 'weird isn't Allen usually the one helping Tiedoll-sensei…wait if Tiedoll-sensei left then what is Allen still doing here?' He heard cries and what he saw was not the most welcoming sight. The white haired boy was tied up and was rufly pushed against the wall near the closet where the pain was kept. So Lavi like a ninja snuck inside without making any noises he got close enough to hear what the attacker said, "Listen you little brat," he pushed Allen harder against the wall, "Normally I would do this by myself but I seeing that your all alone well I decided to take away this pain," 'Is he serious? The guy has an erection!' "And seeing that your gay and all I know that you wouldn't mind," Lavi winced when he heard that. _

"_Hell no!" shouted Allen, "Just because I'm gay doesn't make me a whore!" the attacker was pissed off and punched Allen in the face._

"_I don't give a damn you fag," he shouted and he gripped the white haired boys ass making the said boy wince. _

'_Lavi you have to help him!' The sound of fabric ripping echoed loud and clear in the classroom and the shouts of the albino's protest. 'Lavi he was your friend!' the red head took a peak at the boy, he was naked and the attacker looked like he was ready to attack him at anytime, 'Lavi!' Allen's eyes looked dead at the point, like if fighting was futile. 'Allen…I'm sorry,' he rushed in to help Allen. "HEY!" the attacker stopped and looked at the person who interrupted him. "Leave the kid alone!" _

"_L-Lavi-senpai," said the attacker backing off letting Allen fall on the ground. Lavi punched the attacker hard enough to break the attacker's nose. The now injured person ran away avoiding another fight. "Allen?" no respond, "Allen buddy?" still no respond. Only a tear rolled down his cheeks. "I'm sorry I should have helped you sooner," no respond. "Wait here I'll get you something to wear," he left to go get something to put over the boy. Lavi came back with his gym uniform; it fit the pity boy to big. "I'll take you home," _

"…"

"_I'm really sorry for being a jerk," confessed the red head lifting up the boy in bridal style. "I hope that we can still be friends," _

"_O...Kay," whispered the boy. _

**--End of Flash Back--**  
I know the Allen was almost raped, I felt terrible about the whole situation. But eventually Allen started to go back to being his cheerful self all over again. Lenalee took a while to accept me but she was happy to see Allen happy, she even one time told me that she considered the white haired boy to be like her little brother. Though I've been thinking ever since Lenalee started going out with Kanda she got a tougher attitude, I don't know if that's entirely a good thing. (Sweat drops) But talking about dating, it turns out that there are more gay men out there then what you would think. And this is why…

**--Flash Back--**  
_It was a rainy day, and a Monday morning. Meaning school time, and today isn't the best day for a particular moyashi. 'GAH!' he was walking to school when a fancy sports car just rushed passed him splashing him with a large amount of water. In addition to that his umbrella broke due to the windy day. 'Can this day get any worst?!' thought our beloved moyashi. He was ranting and cursing his way through the streets when he was about to cross the street he almost got ran over by another car, "GAHH!!" but luckily the car stopped inches away from the white haired boy. "Oops sorry there boy," said the man stepping out of the car, "You all right there?" and to answer his question the said boy started sneezing. _

"_Itz all right," he sniffed, 'Great I'm coming down with something,'_

"_Well you don't look all right to me so how's about I help you boy?" offered the man with a Portuguese accent; the man helped Allen up to his feet. "Come I'll give you a ride," _

"_Thanks but I really should…go…to ACHOO school," but the man led him to the passenger side of his car. "I don't live far from here I'll at least get your clothes dry for you," _

"_Thanks Mister…?" _

"_Tyki Mikk, Tyki is just fine," he replied started up the car and started driving. _

"_It's a pleasure to meet you Tyki you can call me Allen," smiled the young boy hugging his shivering body, "Thank you," _

"_No problem really I mean it's my fault I almost ran you over," he chuckled half-heartily (sp?). "So it's the least I could do…by the way how old are you Allen?" _

"_15," he replied after sneezing. The man only hummed in reply. Once they arrived at their destination it was a two family house, not to big not too small but just right. The neighborhood had a friendly feel to it. Tyki had opened the door to his room and had let Allen in, "I can lend you some of my clothes so you can take your off I'll have dry," _

_Once Allen was done he came out of the bathroom, Tyki being the taller guy his clothes were loose fitting on the little moyashi. The older man took the wet clothes and placed it in the dryer, "Hey are you hungry?" _

"_Yea a little," he blushed after his stomach growled. _

_-Time skip-_

_The clock stroke 3, it appears that the two started to get to know each other and confessed their likings for guys. Though Tyki being the eldest understood what a relationship with someone way younger then him could be dangerous, but he started to like the kid and even offered to go out tomorrow for dinner. Allen seemed unsure at first but he had a good feeling about Tyki. _

_-School the next day-_

"_Hi ya Allen," grinned Lavi tackling his friend, "you seem happier then usual!" his friend only blushed. _

"_Well our little Allen is going to his first date tonight," giggled Lenalee appearing out of the blue. This caused the blush on Allen to darken. Lavi felt a bit unease about the idea of Allen dating another guy…but he couldn't be sad or mad for his buddy so he brushed that aside. _

"_So whose the lucky guy?" grinned the red head. _

"_I don't think you know him since he doesn't go to our school," said the moyashi very timid like, "His name is Tyki Mikk," he smiled his angelic smile. Causing a strange feeling in Lavi's heart, he felt jealous, confused, annoyed and much more. _

"_Tyki Mikk? Sounds foreign," replied Lenalee, "but who am I to talk," she giggled she hugged her friend, "If he ever breaks your heart Allen-kun just tell me and I'll beat some sense into him!" _

"_Umm thanks," replied the boy unsure. _

"_Lenalee you've been hanging around Kanda far too long," said Lavi, sweat dropping. _

"_Well I have to go see you guys during lunch," the white haired boy dashed off to class. Lenalee was in an AP class along with Lavi, once the little moyashi was gone Lenalee turned to face Lavi's surprising pale face. _

"_Lavi-kun is something the matter?" she said very directly. She knew when her friends were having problems. _

"_Huh? Oh nothing's the matter," he chuckled pasting on that fake smile immediately changing it with a devious smirk, "nee Lena-lady I just thought of the most awesome idea!" he said throwing his arms over Lenalee's shoulder. "Why don't we spy moyashi-chan you know on his first date just to make sure it's goes all right!" _

"_Hmmm," she placed her fingers under her chin and thought about this plan, "Okay," he grinned and practically skipping to class dragging the Chinese girl with him. _

_-Date time-_

"_Allen!" said Tyki Mikk, "You look really cute," he grinned. Making his date blush. _

"_T-thanks," he stuttered tucking a strand of white hair behind his ear. He walked towards the car parked in front of the small house. _

"_So are you parent's okay with you dating someone like me?" asked the man with black curls. _

"_I don't have parents," he sadly smiled at his date, "B-but please don't worry I've been living strong my whole life!" _

"_I see…well then let's get going," quickly changing the subject Tyki opened the passenger seat and let Allen in while he took his seat in the drivers seat. _

_Meanwhile…_

"_I see them!" whispered Lenalee placing a menu in front of her, "who would of thought that their first date would be a such an expensive place!" _

"_Well thank god jiji is loaded," sighed Lavi looking at the couple. He felt anger rising up as Tyki would whisper something to Allen and make his blush. The red head let out a small growl. _

"_Hey Lavi-kun are you sure that you just want to spy on Allen to make sure their date is fine or is it because you…love Allen-kun?" asked the Chinese girl. _

"_Love?!" his cheeks were as a red as his hair. "Me?!" denial. What a pity…_

"_Ah huh," smirked Lenalee looking at her menu it was in French. "Well it looks like Allen is having fun," she noticed the uneasy feeling in her friend._

_Meanwhile…_

"_So Allen this is your first time dating anyone?" he cued. _

"_Yes…as you may know gay guys aren't really accepted…I mean I often get confused for a girl and I get teased on for that and now I get bullied…" he replied blushing. _

"_Yea I know where you're getting at," he sighed, "But to be young again," he chuckled. They both made their orders. They talked more and got closer then what they thought. At the end of the date Tyki took Allen back to his small home and before Allen could say good-bye Tyki kissed the now red boy. Lavi and Lenalee got a glimpse of that the red head felt heart broken and the girl seemed to be unsure. _

_-5 months later-_

"_I'm sorry Allen," apologized Tyki, "But I have to leave to Europe to take care of some family issues and I might not come back," Allen leaned onto the tanned man and started crying. The man before him was his first accepted love. They kissed their final farewell with enough passion to pass on their message of good-bye. Once his ex left he sent a message to Lenalee and Lavi. Once his friends arrived his hugged the Chinese girl since he still believed that Lavi was homophobic. He cried in the embrace and explained the whole situation. _

"_It's okay Allen there will be more guys out there!" assured Lenalee. _

"…_It's hard to think that when Tyki was my first lover…he accepted me for who I was!" he replied his eyes full of tears. Lavi winced at what the white haired boy said. _

_The clock stroke 10 and Lenalee had to leave, while Lavi offered to stay longer. They just sat on the couch in a very awkward silence. Well at least to Lavi, since he wasn't use to seeing his friend looking very sad and broken…at least since that day. Lavi stood up and sat down next to Allen and wrapped his arms around the pity boy. "It's going to be okay I promise you!" the boy cried again he returned the embrace, while the older of the two placed his chin on top of Allen's head. _

**-End of flashback-**

It was a very awkward yet one of the best times I had with Allen, because he trusted me in one of his depression times. I even slept over that day but no nothing happened, as time went by I started to have feelings for the moyashi and well like 2 months after…Tyki…broke up with Allen I confessed to him. He looked so happy especially when we shared our kiss; the funny thing is that Allen was my first kiss since he shared his first kiss with that person… But I have to admit Allen was one hell of a kisser hehe. People eased down on the bullying since I had Kanda as my back up. He scared the hell out off the people who dared talk bull shit about us. Lenalee was excited about Allen's and me hooking up! Though the year I hated the most came…my 18th birthday. It was my graduation year and the year that I got invited to become a bookman. I told Allen about it and he said this…

**-Flash Back-**

"_Lavi I know that's been your dream to become a Bookman!" grinned Allen kissing his lover. Though Lavi seemed unsure, "Don't make that face! You should be happy!" _

"_Yea but Allen do you know what happens to someone who becomes a Bookman?!" he exclaimed. _

"_Yes I know. But I've told myself that there will come a time where you'll have to leave me," he sighed smiling sadly. "This is your dream and I respect that!" _

"_Allen…"_

"_So go ahead accept that invitation I'll be rooting for you," he smiled his angelic smile. "Excuse me," he rushed to the bathroom. _

"_GAHH!" shouted Lavi out of frustration. He was confused. Allen was the best thing that had ever happened to him. Allen clearly heard that in the bathroom, "Allen I don't want to lose you!" he shouted. The white haired boy came out his eyes a little puffy and red. _

"_Lavi you don…" _

"_Allen it's been a family thing for us to become Bookmen…but I don't want to lose my heart," he sniffed, "But you're the world to me…" he buried his head in his elbow. _

_-the next day-_

_The door to Lavi's room was knocked down and a very angry jiji stood there. The couple woke up immediately at the noise. "You!" said the voice very stern and annoyed, "Lavi Bookman!" he grabbed the red head by the ears. _

"_Jiji?!" he said startled. He didn't dear look at his lover behind him. "What the hell?!" _

"_Why did you decline the historical society?!"_

"_I don't feel like joining a society where I have to lose who I am to history!" he replied with a higher tone. _

"_You could have been the a prodigy if you joined! Lavi your smart enough to join!" Allen winced at the elder mans words, "Is it because of him?!" he pointed at the white haired boy. _

"_Maybe it is maybe it isn't! When the hell did you start caring about my life?!" after what seemed like hours of arguing the old man stormed out of the room. Lavi turned around to face his lover, and he hugged the pity boy, "I'm sorry," he whispered. _

"_What for?" pause, "I mean I'm the reason why you got yelled at…" _

"_No Allen this was my choice to make not old Panda…so don't think about it too much," he nestled his head in Allen's soft white hair, "And promise me that you won't leave me," _

"_I promise," _

_The two sealed it with a kiss. _

**-End of flash back-**

Though in the end I was forced to become a member. I left my little moyashi for 3 years. But once I've had enough and I quit being a Bookman and I went Moyashi hunting! I had enough I missed him, he was my world and my heart couldn't forget him. So I was pratically useless to the Historical Societ... So to fine Allen I had to call Lenalee and she told me god I love her like a sister. Once I found him I made it up with. He agreed to us getting back together. Though at first he was unsure, like he felt guilt. But once we kissed. the Kiss that I missed so much he couldn't say no hehe.

Yea it was a pretty dramatic thing but BUT I don't regret it! I mean 5 years later and we are still a happy couple. I would of married him if it weren't for the damn law. "Lavi!" and speak of the moyashi. "I'm in the study," hehe he must of just woken up. I love it when he wakes up his hair a mess and his clothes practically falling off –smirk-.

"There you are," I pulled him onto my lap and gave him a good morning kiss, which he happily returned. He nestled his head onto my chest; even when he grows up Allen is still as a cute as ever I mean he still looks 15 to me at least :3 "Love you," he says hugging me. Well I guess it's time to go seeing as the moyashi is cuddly today.

See ya!

_**-End of story!-**_

_**Okay so yeah a one shot! Of my favorite pairing Laven =3 Now what inspired me to make this story was the song Collapsed by Aly and Aj, I personally like them! Ever since I was like 10 O.o and I really like that song. So I thought of a -man story and was like what the heck might as well lol**_

_**So it was suppose to be sad at first but then I changed the mood D=**_

_**I decided to make the story about how Lavi and Allen hooked up. I hope that it was good ^^ and I'll be updating my other fanfic's!**_

_**So until next time. **_

_**-Naruhinaforever A.K.A Hina-ichigo =3**_


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